Favorite story posts part 1
That last one
My dad says the ‘making love in a canoe’ about american beer
when you yell “puppy!” at a lil doge and they get happy and wag their lil tail like “yess!! i am a puppy!! a baby dog!!! thank you!!!!!!”
When you yell “puppy!!!!” At an old doge and they wag their tail and get all happy like “yes I am still a little doge thank you for noticing! !”
The man entered his home and was absolutely delighted when he discovered someone had stolen every lamp in the house.
oh my god
i just do not understand this post what even
OH MY FUCKING GOD
most private thing im willing to admit: im not good at estimating how much pasta is enough for one person
there’s a tool for that
I’m sorry, does that scale progress from a child to a HORSE?
OMG GET IT
IM SO HUNGRY
That’s a lot of notes. Let’s all date each other. Everyone get into groups of two.
Let’s do the math then.
with 841,518 reblogs that would be 420,279 couples.
cAN I GET MINE IN PINK PLS
everytime I see this post it has an even amount of notes, I guess I’m just doomed to be alone forever
OH MY GOD
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All I can think of when I look at the last one is
Why cuss when you can use this fun image of snoop dogg?
This gif says nothing, and everything at the same time
seeing your NOTP (that you hate) on your dash, but understanding that it’s their opinion and ur not a hater
I would like to thank my arms, for always being by side. My legs, for always supporting me, and my fingers…because I can always count on them.
this will be my speech when i win an oscar
Don’t forget the hips, for not lying.
The original story of the little mermaid is that she must kill the prince in order to be human, and in the end, she loves him too much and kills herself instead.
The artwork is too great not to reblog.
Ok, ok - important expansion: she only has to kill the Prince because the deal was if he fell in love with her she could be human forever, and he didn’t. By which I mean, he was a good person and genuinely nice to her, but he didn’t fall in love. He fell in love with someone else, also perfectly nice - not the seawitch in disguise, fu Disney. The Mermaid is told she can only return to the sea now if she kills the Prince. She goes into the room where he and his lover lie sleeping and they look so beautiful and happy together that she can’t do it.
That’s why she kills herself. And because it was a noble act she returns to sea as foam.
One moral of the story was that women shouldn’t fundamentally change who they are for love of a man, and in theory Han Christian Anderson wrote it for a ballerina with whom he fell in love. She was marrying someone else who wouldn’t let her dance.
Well shit man
when he buys you the coat u wanted